The Unluckiest Day

It went totally dark on the bus. “ Let me off ta bus to go smoke a cigarette,” said the man in a deep baritone voice in the back of the bus. Probably about three rows behind us. “This is annoying,” said Abina. Yes, it was annoying, for today was the unluckiest day ever. I had moved back to New York three months earlier for no better reason than that was the plan I had made three months before that. Abina was visiting from Chicago where I lived for those three months.

“The mechanic is on the way,” the driver said.
I sighed, but knew it was only another step towards what ultimately would be my death. The lights flashed on and above our heads six televisions showed six different RGB settings of a Sandra Bullock, Hugh Grant film. The total and complete lack of chemistry between the two made the film even harder to ignore, because I started to think about what they did during the filming that was obviously more interesting than the job on hand. Then it went dark on all parts of the bus.

A new bus arrived and we piled out and onto the second bus, it had been traveling for a long time. The smell of the puke didn't hit us until we sat down 3 rows behind it. Before we got on the second bus we saw a mass of black birds flying over the TA truck stop. I had made a list of all the bad things that happend that day. Here is the list.

12:00 AM QuickTime Edit Failure, lose 3 hours of work
1:00 AM Drag everyone out to bar
2:00 AM Harassed by "Bruce Willis" type bartender
3:00 AM Got stinking drunk
4:00 AM Stumble home - eat too much, lose Peter on the way
5:00 AM Wet bed - or seemed to
6:00 AM Throw back out
1:00 PM Leftovers were too cold, heartburn hot
2:00 PM Woke up with hangover again
3:00 PM Forced to make bacon and eggs omelets
3:10 PM Burned omelets
3:20 PM Forgot to put mushrooms in omelets
3:30 PM Informed Abina doesn't like olives in omelets
3:40 PM Dad expects us in Washington, D.C. by 3:00 PM
3:45 PM Missed 3:00 PM bus
4:30 PM While relaxing (sleeping) on can, repeatedly informed that it was 4:30 PM, with implication that we missed 5:00 PM bus
5:00 PM Close examination of skin/face
5:10 PM Attempt to install CD-R software to burn video "The 3rd Day" to disc fails
5:30 PM Sew button on jacket, then discover jacket is covered in stains
6:00 PM Computer CD-ROM drive stops working as a result of CD-R software instillation
6:05 PM After switching to Zip drives, discover all of my Zip discs are full of images that I need to copy to hard rive before deleting
6:10 PM Romantic fog turns to crappy rain
6:15 PM In Taxi, attempt to take photograph but battery dies
6:16 PM Replace battery but taxi stops at bus station
6:16 PM Step out of cab into puddle, sock wet
6:20 PM Buy ticket, experience awkward misunderstanding around "Belle" that denotes a cultural clash of aesthetics
6:25 PM Get in line for Silver Spring, Abina goes for water, line immediately moves forward to load bus- I curse "Where the fuck is she?"
6:30 PM Single TV on bus casting sickly purple radiation - it never turns off
7:30 PM Bus begins to stop every 20 minutes to wait on side of road for 20 minutes we never know why - driver ignores passengers
8:00 PM Attempt to write story "the most unlucky day" on laptop battery dies
8:15 PM Must pee
9:00 PM Interrupted every 5 minutes while trying to finish list
9:35 PM Bus finally collapses in truck stop, wait 30 minutes for new bus
10:00 PM Fight way on to new bus
10:15 PM New bus has a pile of vomit in last seat that is 3 rows back, everyone smells it

Abina made a list of all the things she thought were great about the day. It was half as long.